Inside outside
I’m back i swear
Writing in my Substack right now feels like I just returned to school and I’m giving a summary on how my summer was. I think it’s because I’m struggling to not just write “i got to hang out with all my friends. It was very fun” over and over again. Which is actually what my little journals are full of. Aside from the usual angsty and depressing entries that circle back to being angry with the state or my parents.— I’m sitting in my living room on a couch which is huge for me since I haven’t had a couch in my apartment for over a year. I have lived longer here without a couch than with one. Last winter I healed from top surgery in a camping chair, would never recommend it. The cold weather is bringing all the memories from last year when i was getting the run-around from credit card companies and my surgeon trying to figure out my finances up until the last week before my surgery. Now, I’m still healing and paying off medical bills but at least I can sit on this couch!
I’m feeling very grateful and proud of the support system I’ve been able to build in the last couple years in New York. I had a very beautiful and heartbreaking summer that I really wouldn’t have been able to manage without the help of all of my people. I went on several roadtrips with loved ones, swam in so many bodies of water, ate so much good food and met more beautiful people. Tattooing is truly magic and so abundant and has given me a life i could have only dreamed of 11 years ago. When I gave myself my first tattoo at 17 I knew, this is it. It felt a bit too good to be true, it was so fun I had no idea I would be able to pay my bills (sometimes i still dont hahaha) let alone be able to travel and meet so many people just as obsessed and possessed by the power of tattoo. Tattooing to me is a craft as well as a spiritual practice and it can not exist without other people. So I am constantly trying to work on my technique, creating, and improving my relationships.
I feel so lucky to find myself surrounded by more people that center liberation in their practices than ever before. The idea to keep politics out of tattooing is just bullshit, you can’t separate politics from jackshit, and you can’t separate the economic state of tattooing from the multiple genocides occurring, as well as the other atrocities the US is committing on the coasts of Venezuela and the bombings in Kabul via US puppet gov of Pakistan. People are being kidnapped in the light of day by masked fascists and families are being torn apart. There is more to life than complaining about our clients and bookings. I think to put it very simply, the more you care about other people the more people will care for you. It’s not just karmic and it’s not just a simple give and take. Living a life where you center liberation and act with the default of generosity and kindness is not easy, there will be times where you will get fucked over but that is just gonna happen sometimes anyways. But if you really keep an open heart and love people deeply, like i mean really love on your people, your people will always love you :) I’m in love with life, i don’t hate that i gotta eat and shit and sleep, i really try to romanticize it all. For a while I was even biking the Williamsburg bridge on the first of every month to lessen the blow of paying rent by enjoying the beautiful view. Some stuff is toxic positivity for sure but there is a lot of beauty everywhere. The current life i live as someone raised in the states could only exist at the expense of many exploited people and environments. I can’t move without thinking about that all the time (especially as a person in diaspora) so I do think I (and especially every US citizen) owe a lot to all oppressed people and the earth.
If the atrocities committed by the people in power across the globe don’t worry you enough and you’re still worried about bookings, then paint something, draw something, glue something, carve something, don’t stop making things just because you’re not making money. Remember the urge to destroy is also a creative urge. There’s gatherings every week, go burn something. The tattoo gods can smell it on you if you’re only here to take. Love and devotion will take you far.
I am still babysitting kids of Afghan refugees every month for the nonprofit Afghans for a Better Tomorrow, and we do need more Dari/Pashto speakers. If you are interested please text me and i can give you more information. If anyone would like to donate any suitcases, backpacks, school supplies or art supplies (notebooks, calculators, rulers, markers, etc) winter clothes for men/women and children of all ages, kitchen supplies such as tea kettles, pots /pans, and cups/plates. Text 818-305-5827 for info or to coordinate drop off in Brooklyn or Queens.
I’ve thought about hosting teach-ins to educate people about the history of Afghanistan because it is still appalling to hear how very little most Americans know about it even though it was technically the longest US war. One of my favorite history facts is that Afghan tribes, NOT a national army, defeated British troops at the height of British imperialism. There is a podcast called Blowback that has a season that covers more modern Afghan history and US intervention. It’s kind of corny but covers a lot.
I am booking tattoos for November and December in NYC. I will be doing a Halloween flash day from 12-9pm $100 skulls you can either pick from a sheet I’m working on or let me draw something on maybe fill that gap that’s been bothering you. I’ll be back in LA in December and will be traveling a lot again next year, I might be visiting Salt Lake City, San Diego and Mexico City very soon, send me an email if you’re interested in getting tattooed in any of these place.
Took this photo of someone surfing at rockaway, in another newsletter i will gush about surfing.
These are all some large projects I’ve been really excited about. I would love to start some more large scale pieces, I’ve been fleshing out larger scale concepts if you have an idea please reach out I’m always willing to work with your budget.
Dianne Mansfield taking photos of me outside Spiral Tattoo in Ann Arbor Michigan. A huge highlight of my summer was getting to cook burgers for the most iconic couple in tattooing. Now I’m convinced the years i worked as a burger cook were leading me up to this moment.